I had an interesting, but great day yesterday. It didn't start out wonderfully, but that all changed. I wanted to share with you my journal entry from last night explaining the little miracles from God sent throughout my day.
Journal Entry from August 22nd, 2014:
Father, today is such a testimony to how You manifest Your strength in us. As I rose from my sleep this morning after a rough and painful night, I was beyond tired. The boys made their precious, yet rambunctious presence known as they ran all over their room, waiting as patiently as a 3 year old knows how, for Mom to greet her babies and feed them breakfast. Rence was already at work at JSU, as usual on the weekdays, so all responsibility was on me.
I lay in bed trying to manipulate my sacroiliac (SI) joints so they would stretch (painful, but effective) before I stood from bed, allowing for better and less painful mobility from the stiffness in the joints. As I lie there with increased pain & a constant state of fatigue (different from being groggy; caused by my diagnosis of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) from the typical morning, my thoughts focused on how I was going to make it through the day while caring for two toddlers. I began to pray that You, God, would give me the strength and energy needed to get through the day and accomplish things that needed to be done.
As You so often do, You, my Precious Lord, far exceeded my expectations (why do we NOT expect more of a God who can accomplish ANYTHING?!). Despite the increased fatigue & pain, I pushed myself to get out of bed and get the boys ready for the day. Within the hour, I began to feel relief of both the fatigue & pain. I knew it was You, Lord - the hand of God - at work. Here are some things I would be able to accomplish on a good day (regarding pain & energy levels): I might be able to get a few minor chores done around the house or run out for an errand or two. Today, however, I was able to tailor/sew modifications to maternity clothing given to me (we make pennies stretch around here). This tailoring makes the clothes appear non-maternity (to the eye) when complete, yet the comfort factor is still there. I finished four shirts and four pants. I was then able to take the boys out to the Oxford Lake Park playground and let them play for a good hour or so, followed by an hour-long trip to Sam's Club for a grocery run. We returned home at 8:30 to get a bath, read a book as a family, and get tucked in for bed by 9:00.
Father, I am convinced that my situation of chronic illness and pain has brought me closer to You, and for that, I praise Your wonderful, sovereign Name! I can't help but think of 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 when I write this journal entry.
I was so very weak this morning - there was nothing in me to continue the day. You stepped in (per my request) and You were my strength. So many times, people ask "how do you do it with twins and a disability?" My answer is "God gives me the strength." I now realize how wrong that answer is. Father God, You ARE my strength. God IS my strength when I cannot carry on. I praise You for showing me my fault, and even better, showing me Your strength yet again today. May You always be the One glorified!