Are you blessed?

I am beyond blessed! I have a beautiful and healthy family, God is using my hardships for His glory (eek!!!!) and God is the center of our home. We may make mistakes on a daily basis (apparently, that takes some people by surprise ;D), but we are covered by God's wonderful grace - oh, how we don't deserve it! I pray our boys find His grace when they reach the age of accountability (only God knows that time). What is there to complain about? When God is the center of our lives, we will find ourselves content in every situation. I can tell when I begin to fall out of the center of God's will when I become ungrateful and make complaints. It's a great way to self-check where we are spiritually. Where do you stand right now, spiritually speaking? 

Philippians 2:14 - 16 Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain.

It's My BIRTHDAY!

Today, on October 9th, 2013, I am 14 years old. That is, it was 14 years ago that I was reborn in Christ. What exactly does that mean? I laid down my old and sinful self (which we are all born with) and clothed myself with righteousness through Christ (Isaiah 61:10 - He has clothed me with garments of salvation, He has wrapped me with a robe of righteousness. ). The term "righteousness" simply means that we (believers of Christ) follow His commands and do His will for our lives. The Christian life is not easy if we live according to God's will, but I have never regretted my decision to surrender my life to the Lord - never.

Something happened to make me realize I was a sinner. Was it knowledge, was it a person in my life or godly parents? I think it was a little of all of this. I will say that I firmly believe that God runs after us, even before we run to Him. I believe the Holy Spirit was the biggest contributing factor in the opening of my calloused heart to hear and receive the truth of God.

As I gathered at a church lock-in with a youth group and my best friend (I was a guest at her church that night), something began to lay heavy on my heart. I was 13 years old at the time. At 8 years old, I had said the sinner's prayer with my Mother and been baptized. So why was I having such strong feelings of doubt? As the youth minister began talking about Jesus' amazing sacrifice, the truth began to resonate within. I knew at that moment that 5 years ago, I had simply said a fancy prayer and gone for a swim in the baptismal. It meant nothing when I was 8, simply because I had not yet been able to comprehend the immense torture, pain, sacrifice, grace, forgiveness and love that was centered around the symbol of the cross. Now, at 13 years of age, I finally understood enough to truly believe and be a child of the true King. I felt, for the first time in my life, the presence of God fill my life. It was the most indescribable joy I've ever felt, and I wept in awe of the Holy Spirit's presence that immediately filled my soul.

14 years later, I look back to see everything God has done through my redeemed life in Christ. I have completed my bachelors degree in music education, taught elementary music education for one year, began a family despite the risks involved due to my conditions (a set of twins, which are our miracle babies - click HERE to see our testimony of the twins), I was baptized by immersion in February 2013 (I had not been baptized after my sincere decision to follow Christ when I was 13 - I made this right in February), I am privileged to be a volunteer counselor and Earn-While-You-Learn mentor with our local crisis pregnancy center (Sav-a-Life), my husband has been placed in a stable job (as a math instructor at JSU), I am a stay-at-home mom and wife (which i love), and we are now in the process of jump-starting a Chronic Illness Ministry for Women: Sufficient Grace Ministry (click HERE for the link and to see more information).

One of the most challenging, yet rewarding times in my spiritual walk would be that of my chronic medical conditions. I thank God for the opportunities He brings through my pain and turmoil. I praise Him for the intimacy that many do not understand, simply because I have had to learn to lean on and trust in Him more. How would we ever begin to understand the sufferings that Jesus was put through on this earth (preceding death and on the cross) if we ourselves were exempt from pain and hardships? It is a pure joy to be able to help others that struggle in similar ways (through chronic illness or pain) and be able to encourage and relate to them with genuine understanding and compassion. It doesn't make tribulations in life easy, but it certainly makes them possible.

2 Corinthians 1:3-7 - Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 5 For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. 6 If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. 7 Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.

Thank you, Lord, for yet another year under your wings. I love you, with all of my heart, soul, strength, and mind. You are my Romancer, my Great Redeemer and Savior, and there will never be another like You.

How Can I Use My Hardships for God?

www.thehighcalling.org

A  friend of mine shared this quote on her Facebook page, and I couldn't help but share. We all have struggles in our life, but the question is how do we handle those struggles? Do we whine and complain, maybe even asking God "why me"? Many times, it's hard to understand why God has us in certain situations. But once we understand that God has a divine purpose through the rough times, those wounds don't ache quite so much.

We are told in 2 Corinthians 1:3-7 that we are given rough circumstances in order to experience the unsurpassing comfort of our Lord. Check out verse 5 - "For the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with His comfort through Christ." In essence, we are given earthly hurt and sorrow to experience divine joy, peace and comfort.

When we accept our troubles as a part of God's plan, we will experience the rewards of following Him. And He won't just give us those rewards - He will shower us with those rewards. We will be caught in a downpour!

Now that we've experienced God's wonderful gift of comfort, we can share that same comfort with others. Be contagious with compassion for others. "Our wounded places become ministry spaces", and oh, how He fills me with joy! Try it. Find someone who you can relate to (ex: chronic illness, divorce) and genuinely invest in him/her. You will see God's blessings overflow.

2 Corinthians 1:3-7
³ All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. ⁴ He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. ⁵ For the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ. ⁶ Even when we are weighed down with troubles, it is for your comfort and salvation! For when we ourselves are comforted, we will certainly comfort you. Then you can patiently endure the same things we suffer. ⁷ We are confident that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in the comfort God gives us.


She Doesn't Look Handicap...

Can you count how many times you've seen someone misuse a handicap decal? Probably not. Or maybe it is a common case of mistaken judgment. Sure, people misuse handicap decals, but many do not. How can you tell the difference...the wheelchair...the cane? The answer is that you can't tell the difference between proper use and misuse.

There are so many hidden or invisible illnesses that society is simply unaware of. Now days, people have to see evidence of a disease, impairment, or disability in order to accept that someone is truly ill. However, the vast majority of disabilities and illnesses are hidden. Chronic pain, chronic fatigue syndrome, arthritis, and diabetes are just a few hidden impairments. 96% of people with chronic medical conditions live with a condition that are invisible (according to John Hopkins University). These people ARE qualified to have a handicap decal by means of a doctor's approval.

So the next time you see a young lady, like myself, park in a handicap space with a legal handicap decal, don't assume I'm using my Mother's handicap decal - it is indeed issued to me. Please don't be one of so many that cuts their eyes at me with a nasty look or leaves me a cruel note - you are better than that. And please don't teach your kids through your actions that it takes someone in a wheelchair to be legitimately disabled. Think before you make judgments. 

"Psalm For a Dark Night"





Image from http://exodusinternational.org



 

Lord, Just today I read
That Paul and Silas were
Stripped and beaten
With wooden whips.
"Again and again the rods
Slashed across their bared backs"
But in their desolate dungeon
Their feet clamped in stocks
They prayed.

They sang.

 They praised.

In the musty midnight of my life
Imprisoned in the dungeon of confusion
Bound by chains of anguish
Help me, please help me
To pray
To sing
To praise

Until the foundation shakes
Until the gates fling open
Until the chains fall off
Until I am free
To share the Good News
With other chain-bound prisoners.
 

- Ruth Harms Calkin
 

(Quoted in the book

When Your World Falls Apart - Seeing Past the Pain of the Present

by Dr. David Jeremiah)

Ignoring the Ignorant

I have been using my wheelchair out in public since April 2013, which is two months time. You would think I would have gotten "over" the ignorance of so many that can't see past my ability to walk yet use a chair...they think they have a right to judge, even though they clearly can't see the chronic pain I battle day in and day out. I tell you truthfully that people come unhinged with shock when I stand up out of my wheelchair to grab an item off the top shelf at a store. Yes, it's funny in hindsight, but quite frustrating when I see the numbers of ignorant (and rude) gawking people within such a short time span.

Please understand that my chair gives me so much freedom and a quality of life like I've never had since my chronic pain condition began. But I'm going to be very open and honest with you. I've been feeling bogged down by the frustration I explained above. There is a staggeringly high percentage of society that has no clue that it is possible for someone to use a wheelchair for any other reason than paraplegia, and it's very frustrating...especially when you are the one affected. I am gradually learning to ignore the ignorant, but it's taking time. I wish it were like a light switch, where I could have instant results. But life is about learning, and that takes time, experience, and awareness.

I've said this many times on my blog, in person, and/or on Facebook - God is in control of it all, and He has a divine purpose for this "season" of life. I have already seen God teach me to "stand strong" and how to radically trust Him (I'm always learning about completely surrendered trust in the Lord) through this experience.

I have also seen God use my situation at VBS (Vacation Bible School). I had to call on God to give me the courage to take my wheelchair into church for the first time (keep in mind I go to a church with approximately 400 members). I knew I needed it to get through the day, but I was afraid of the attention it would undeniably attract, as well as the endless questions followed by my response. I even cried about it the night before VBS, asking God over and over for courage and help in trusting Him. Many of you may remember my post on Facebook asking for prayers to be bold and courageous and to trust Him...this is why. And our big theme for this year's VBS, you may ask?...."STAND STRONG!" How appropriate! I reminded myself daily how I needed to always stand strong, and how I was continuously learning to stand strong in tough situations. That completely surrendered trust finally came, thanks to God giving me that strength to trust Him & the many prayers that came my way. And daily, I prayed that I would "Stand Strong" in Him, and not allow the wheelchair to be a distraction for what we were all there to accomplish.

My week at VBS would not have been possible without my chair. In addition to God's continual lesson in my life in terms of trust, God allowed me to share my situation with my crew members (the seven members of my 5th grade VBS team), as well as the entire 5th grade group (around 50 kids). My crew members were the most receptive people I've encountered thus far as to my disability (even among adults). I explained that I was able to walk and stand like they were, but I couldn't walk as far or stand as long. They simply wanted their turn to pop a wheelie. ;)

And God's blessings continued - I learned after the week had finished that one of my crew members has a dad that is a paraplegic, and the relative that brought him watched him throughout the week as she worked with us at VBS. She said she'd seen him open up only to a few people like he did to me since his dad's accident. He was eager to push me up the hills, hold the doors, etc. I really like to do things on my own as if I was walking, but you can't resist the help of these sweet & accepting 5th graders. Bottom line - the wheelchair helped "break the ice" with this young man. Out of 500 kids in VBS, I was placed with this child. We tend to underestimate the miracles God can do on a smaller level (me included), and I felt like the week of VBS might have been a breakthrough for both me and this precious young boy. It's times like this where God gently nudges me with the reminder that our trials in life are usually a part of a bigger & much more glorious picture (if we are children of the King).

It's also times like this that I am in awe of how my Savior knows my spirit and knows when I need His gentle hand to lift my head.

Isaiah 41:10 - Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with My victorious right hand.

So as down as I may get about society's lack of disability education, I have to remember to ignore the ignorant and continually praise my Savior for teaching and standing by me every step of the way. More than that, I praise Him over and over for the uplifting miracles I see Him perform in this story of life using a difficult situation and season of life, yet working it out for His glory and His good. And for that, it's all worth it.

Scripture on Suffering & Trials/Tribulations

Image from http://laboringinthelord.com

*All are ESV version unless noted otherwise

Psalm 22:24
For he has not despised or abhorred the affliction of the afflicted, and he has not hidden his face from him, but has heard, when he cried to him.

Psalm 34:19
Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.

Isaiah 41:10
Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you, I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

Isaiah 43:2
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.    

Isaiah 66:9 (NCV)
I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born, says the Lord.

John 11:35

Jesus wept.

John 16:33
I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.

Romans 5:3-5
We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.        

Romans 8:18
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Romans 8:26-28
The Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And He who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.     

2 Corinthians 4:8-10
We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.

2 Corinthians 4:17
For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison.

Philippians 1:29-30
For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake, engaged in the same conflict that you saw I had and now hear that I still have.

Philippians 3:10

That I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death.

Colossians 1:24

Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I am filling up what is lacking in Christ's afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the church,.

2 Timothy 2:3-4
Share in suffering as a good soldier of Christ Jesus. No soldier gets entangled in civilian pursuits, since his aim is to please the one who enlisted him.

James 1:2-4
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

1 Peter 4:12-13
Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings.
    

1 Peter 5:10
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.